I am preparing to do Bill Phillip's "Body for Life" program again. I have a history with this program and with Sjogren's Syndrome that I will share at a later date, I'm just too tired right now from a long day. Here is what I wrote last night:
I am tired of feeling sluggish and fat and my clothes constantly shrinking. ;-) I know this time it is not the Sjogren's Syndrome bothering me because I am productive, my mood is pretty good with a few normal hormonal swings (doh - Light-bulb moment: Cookie binge today was totally in sync with my cycle so I will stop beating myself over the head with this). Anyway, it is NOTHING like the debilitating fatigue I feel when the Sjogren's Sydrome is not controlled. So often when that fatigue would hit and I couldn't do anything, I would wonder if it was Sjogren's or something mental wrong with me. Now I feel confident that it was the Sjogren's and that I will finally be able to recognize when the Sjogren's is flaring up. Increasing the Plaquenil dose has really been the right thing for me. I wonder if, when I lose 50 pounds, I should decrease the dose at that time. . .In the interest of being honest with this blog, I will also say that I have been taking 1/2 Celexa each day. As I entered perimenopause, I started having anxiety attacks over silly things, like what to fix for dinner. Looking back it was almost comical, but there was nothing funny about it while I was living it. Anyway, I started 1/2 tablet a day and I haven't had a single anxiety attack since.
So tonight I am going to "Cross the Abyss: as Bill Phillips says in his book. It requires you to state your reasons for wanting to do the program and to set specific goals, in writing, and then read them every day. Looking back, I realize that the last time I attempted this program, while I originally wrote my reasons and had a goal, I did not read them every day, or do the visualization exercises he recommends.
My Reasons: All the usual stuff - I want to be fit and feel good and have more energy and be a better mother and wife and over-all person. I want to look and feel good in clothes and be strong as I age rather than weaker. I want to go Mountain biking with my husband and children. I want to walk all over China next year and I want to look great for my 30 Year High School Reunion next year. I want to do something I can really be proud of. I want this to be a launching point for more goal setting. The last time I did BFL I was feeling strong and confident mentally and used that strength to find a better school for my children. I am not sure I would have had the perseverence to do it without the emotional strength and drive that came along with the physical strenth of the program. It turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made. At the end of this process I will set new goals, not just about fitness, but other ares of my life. For instance, I want to write more (I am going to start by blogging about this journey) and I want to learn spanish. Someday, in the more distant future I would like to take some creative writing and art classes, piano, keeping my brain engaged and learning.
Now for the specifics. These are Goals and Tools to help me reach the goals:
1. I will lose 20 pounds of fat and gain muscle and strength over the course of this 12 week challenge which I will officially begin on Monday, July 11, 2011.
2. I will blog about my experience (see, I started!).
3. I will set new goals at the end of the 12 weeks.
4. I will only weigh myself on Mondays.
5. I will take measurements every 3 weeks and graph my results.
6. I will do freezer cooking in order to make meal prepartions for my family easier, thus reducing my risk of falling off the program.
7. I will cean my kitchen every night because everyone's day starts off better with a clean kitchen (see Flylady.net).
8. I will use my aerobic time to work on "Future Vision" (See Bill Phillips book, Body for Life).
9. I will be able to go mountain biking with some friends who are very fit.
10. I will keep a food and exercise log.
11. I will slow down my eating and stop when I am full.
12. I will go to bed early and start using an alarm clock if I'm not getting up early enough to get my exercise done.
13. I will lose 45-50 pounds before my 30 Year reunion.
14. I will wear my favorite Sarong style dress again.
Three Patterns of Action that have held me back:
1. Eating too quickly, overeating before my body can tell me it is full.
2. Failing to plan = planning to fail. Not planning my meals, but more importantly not planning my family's meals = meal time stress = overeating.
3. Sleep: not getting to bed early enough to get up do do my workout in the morning.
New Patterns that I need to develop to succeed:
1. Eat slowly, mindfully. Set fork down between bites. Stop when full.
2. Plan meals.
3. Get enough sleep.
Looking back on my last challenge I realize I did not use all of the tools; I didn't read my goals or visualize at all. I lapsed on the planning and eventually became overwhelmed. Well,no more. I am going to spend the next few days re-reading Bill Phillip's "Body for Life" and planning for a great challenge.
Now - back to today.
While I've not "officially" started, I did make it to the gym today and did my Hight Intensity Interval Training (HIIT) on the spin cycle. I am going to jump start the process with some spin because it has really helped my mountain biking in the past. I know the lower body workout will also strengthen me for the ride, but this was a good place to start.
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